Uncle Walter's Bad Romance Novel Quotes

Like some sort of parasitic twin, or teratoma? Uh... sexy?

"They moved together in mounting urgency, the sweetly scented bedcoverings crushed beneath them. Surrounded by the wind and consumed by the fire between them, they mated.
It felt eternal. Enduring and infinite. As if he were the rest of her, some part she left behind before birth."

Always -- Carol Rose

A Marie Curie romance. Spoiler Alert: it doesn't have a happy ending.

"Every time my radiating bosom touched his fiery skin, I felt a shrill sensation of excitement coil through me, making my legs intertwine with his own, as though they were begging to be set free of my jeans."

Come Home Cowboy -- Alyssa Canter

Either she has an innie or someone needs to retake Anatomy 101

"Brooks braced his hands on the sheets beside her head, and his cock slipped into the valley of her clit and finding it warm and slick."

Bidding on Brooks -- Katy Regnery

P.S. Grammatical errors are those of the author, not Uncle Walter

It required the expertise of an erotic structural engineering seamstress

"Though not yet fully matured, she had already reached the age where the full white terrace of her breasts swelled against the retaining fabric of her gown, the current of her ripening form rising inexorably to overflow the woven levee of restraint."

Amour -- Samantha Kaye

Do diamonds have feelings?

 "He wanted to make her feel better than diamonds."

Against the Dark -- Carolyn Crane

The Lowest Temp for Magma is 1,292 °F and 3rd Degree Burns Begin at 120 °F - Do the Math

"Heat spilled over my skin like molten lava, burning, consuming, coating my body until I was one quivering mass."

Club Prive -- M.S. Parker

Scrotal Vertigo can affect anyone without warning.

"The rush of lust to his crotch was dizzying, and when she licked her lips, he knew he was in serious lust."

Seducing Jane Porter -- Dominique Adair

Twatnado

"Her whole body was shaking with fury and desire. 'Easy, love,' he said, rubbing a finger back and forth over her, sending shockwaves coursing into the swollen wet vortex of her sex."

Temptation in Time -- Alexa Aames (Secrets Vol. 14)

Repeat after us: Super Glue is not lube.

"His fist was now enclosed around his cock and he was driving it up and down, pumping himself as the water continued its pulsing beat where his hand and cock were joined."

Hot in Here -- Sophie Renwick

But how'd the spider even get in there?

"You might have woken me as Venom, but right now my cock thinks you look just like Black Widow and it wants into your web."

The Alphabet Game -- Andie M. Long