Uncle Walter's Bad Romance Novel Quotes

Pretty sure that's not how orgasms work.

"Her cries had barely faded before he was thrusting into her again. Lust rolled through his bloodstream as fire licked down his spine. Dimly he was ware of Kay's cries as the familiar sensation of orgasm trickled up the back of his calves.
His brain exploded into a red haze as his balls tightened and release tore through him. His breath raged in his lungs and his knees threatened to buckle as wave after wave rushed through him."

Louisiana Heat -- Dominique Adair (Party Favors)

This is going to end in disappointment for at least one of them.

"Every man I met zeroed in on my boobs like a baby wanting milk. There was no milk, but I never minded them trying."

Hunting for Love -- Jodie Springer

Hunting for Love is no longer available at Amazon so here's an ad for small game hunting.  Same thing right?

Adult Swim

"Then he palmed her butt cheeks again, though from this new angle, spread them apart, took another deep breath and dove in."

Taken Back -- Alyna Amorosi

...but how'd she get the bees in there?

"Without hesitation, he fisted his cockstand to press it against her clit, working it across the tight little pearl until she began to buck and shudder, coating him with the slick honey from her core."

Seduction Wears Sapphires -- Renee Bernard

What an excellent day for an exorcism.

"Her head spun and although she knew she shouldn't, she moved her lips against his, tasting the forbidden."

Reader submission by DeanaTroi
Uncle Walter cannot verify ownership of submissions, but he'll take your word for it.

To Blackmail a Di Sione -- Rachael Thomas

Not to play into stereotypes but if he's that concerned with styling your hair he may not be all that into the sex part.

"He smiled down at her as he made sure to pat down her sex hair."

Bearllionaire -- Sky Publishing (Scent of Seduction)

It's penis adjective bingo!

"I looked down and saw that his stiff, thick, erect, and long manhood was pointing directly at me. My tongue damn near flew out my mouth to get at it."

His Dirty Secret -- Mia Black

It's Jake... from State Farm.

"My body shuddered because I wanted him right now. I don't care what he looked like. I was going to fuck his voice."

Broken -- K. Webster

How's the peeping? Tommy, how's the peeping?

"Leaning up a little, I peeked inside the window. My breathing stopped completely when I realized it was her bedroom. She was sitting on the edge of her bed, unlacing her black combat boots, and when I pulled my cock out I didn't stop to think about what I was doing. All of a sudden I had my dick in my hand."

Pulling Her Trigger -- Alexa Riley