Uncle Walter's Bad Romance Novel Quotes

Hazing for the Honeycomb Hideout was harsh -- bee excretions and a 9-volt battery...

"Pleasure spread like warm honey in his abdomen as electric tingles pulsed up and down the length of his cock."

Till Dawn with the Devil -- Alexandra Hawkins

Well, he had skipped lunch to get straight to cunnilingus...

"There may be a dead fish in there 'in case you get hungry.'"

Demon from the Dark -- Kresley Cole

Shawn could only count to 43

"'Can we do a sixty-nine?' she asked without looking into his face. Sixty-nine? Is this bitch crazy? Shawn sat down and shook his head.'Nah, I don't think so.'"

Teri Woods Triangle of Sins -- Nurit Folkes

Few can handle the unleashed frenzy of canis lupus eroticus

"Tiny pinpricks of molten pleasure-pain skittered across the thin sensitive skin along his shaft. His wolf was mating."

Scion Revelation Book 3 -- Patrice Michelle

His 165psi Womb-Rooter burst through her cervix as if her ovaries had screamed for Kool-Aid!

"Vaguely she heard Jamie shout, felt him stiffen, felt the hot splash of his seed against the walls of her womb."

Lord of the Night -- Cara Miles

A supernova burst in her cornea as a cacophony of a puddled pelt pounding serenaded her.

"Thighs and belly slick with sweat, he drove up against her back and butt. Wet skin clacking. Kane's voice. Liquid fire in jets inside her. Tiny suns burst beneath her eyelids."

Thrill of the Hunt -- Nathalie Gray (Naughty Nooners Special Collection 2)

Why must I be a Phrenologist in love?

"Her hands tangled in his hair once more, taking pleasure in the clean locks, in the firm skull."

That Scandalous Evening -- Christina Dodd

Finger? She could only be so lucky. No, she gets stuck with Factory Seconds from the Hickory Farms store.

"Her mother had said very little on the matter of the appearance of this appendage other than to describe it as similar to a finger. 'But larger, one hopes,' she'd added in a mutter. Avelyn suspected she hadn't been meant to hear the added comment. Paen's was certainly larger than a finger, but it looked nothing like one to her. A rather lumpy sausage perhaps, she thought faintly, the blinked as a drop of water dripped off the end of it, drawing her eye."

The Perfect Wife -- Lynsay Sands

Her patriotic panties held a pyrotechnic pussy and it was gonna be one hell of a holiday!

"His hands tightened their grip, keeping her ruthlessly pinned as he sucked so hard her every nerve detonated in an erotic Fourth of July."

Jane's Warlord -- Angela Knight

He had the sex mustard to make a meal of it, too!

"Your lifting up that wet T-shirt and pulling a tuna can out of your bra is one of the sexiest moves I've ever seen, either on-screen or off."

A Cat's Game -- Vicki Lewis Thompson (Cupid Cats)