Uncle Walter's Bad Romance Novel Quotes

She returned ten Power Gems to Spirit Island and equipped the Fairy of Power -- Orally.

"As soft as pillows, her lips crushed under his, remolding to the contours of his mouth, and the dark heat of her tongue pressed between her lips like a tiny blazing sword."

Cold Case, Hot Bodies -- Jule McBride

Some guys will say anything to get into your pants.

"'Drake,' she said with a sob, 'we mustn't.'
His breathing was uneven as he rasped in her ear, 'Yes, we must. If we don't, I'm going to explode.'"

Eloquent Silence -- Sandra Brown

The seminal load has reached the waginal wessel!

"Her whole being was overtaken by a series of shuddering ripples which made her shake and tremble. She gave herself to them, tossing her head from side to side, flinging her arms out, crying aloud, and her moans were soon joined by a sighing groan from Rory as he reached his climax and jettisoned his pearls into the seabed of her womb."

Sweet Temptation -- Caroline Standish

The author unpacked her adjectives. And adverbs. And similes. There was a lot of grammatical luggage.

"He cried out softly, in wonder and adoration at this innocent child who begged for a woman's fulfillment. He lowered her delicately to the cushions, and his eyes were like the eyes of the cheetah during the fateful hunt. He poised above her, all bunched muscle and knotted sinew. She caressed his muscled chest and began to breathe deeply, in a passionate rhythm. He forced her legs to part and his hard stomach brushed her own tender abdomen. Her fingers tightened on his biceps and his now questing shaft slid deliciously inside. Even as he entered her, he hesitated at the mysterious curtain of her womanhood.
She wanted to urge him on, but her voice caught in her throat. The surging violence of their passion hesitated, as storm clouds part to flood the drenched land with moonlight just before the howling gales come again. At this moment, De Rais was no ruffian knight. He was a master of the brush, entering her with a balance of hesitation and force.
Shan T'u breathed in sharply, biting her lip. her throat stung with the bite of Kung's knife. De Rais plunged, deep into her core, shredding the fragile curtain as he had crumpled her silken gown. At this instant, pain and rapture merged, as rocks and water merge in a garden. He was past her torn veil, and he struck now as a warrior strikes. Her legs wrapped around his tremendous thighs and her hips undulated. Again and again the silken rod thrust to her core, filling her. She was consumed in flame and the helpless sensations rocked her in wave upon wave, pouring from her body, drenching her flesh. Then she felt De Rais stiffen as if mortally shot, and white fire rifled through her loins. He moaned like a wounded soldier and shuddered under her clenching hands.
For a long time afterward, she lay nestled in his arms, and her skin sweetly damp against his. Her spine was pillowed in his chest and he kissed the nape of her neck and her shoulder. She touched her lips reverently to his knuckles and fingers and enfolded his hand in both of hers, as she had cuddled her doll when she was a child."

Jade Moon -- Erica Mitchell

Had to keep the Mongols out somehow.

"Their bodies locked as the spasms rocked through them like shots of lightening. His final thrusts going so deep it felt like he'd found a wall inside her body."

Best Night Ever -- Keara Kevay

The dangers of "associating" with assassins. By the time you hear them coming, it's too late.

"One of his hands left her bottom and reached up to toy with her breast. The sensations intensified. She squirmed and his low laughter added to the sensations, carrying her even higher.
She'd never felt anything like this, had not known it was possible. Surely, she would expire before he was done. Perhaps that was his intent. To kill her with his attentions. She'd certainly sleep well then -- for all eternity."

Pleasures of a Notorious Gentleman -- Lorraine Heath

All we know for certain is that something is mingling. Other than that, we've got no clue.

"She cried out in blinding ecstatic passion again and again until his mouth caught her cries and they mingled with his as their bodies mingled. Gillian was half sobbing, totally losing control and rendered incapable of feeling anything but the white-hot strength-sapping magic that tumbled her like a feather in a hurricane."

Passion's Raging Storm -- Sylvie F. Sommerfield

Her nether regions trebuchet tossed him into a cataclysm of volcanic need

"Luc let himself sink down into a moist, pulsing darkness and felt her muscles tighten around him at once, the pressure light at first, then stronger, astonishingly powerful as her tension increased. Luc felt the blood rush to his head; heat burst out across his skin; a smoky haze clouded his vision. He felt a rampaging need to plunder and possess and his mouth on Keira's was wild, devouring, his hand at her breasts no longer tender. Lifting her by the buttocks he drove down in a frenzy of passion and felt a shuddering spasm pass through her body, stronger, more violent with each thrust he made. Her nails were digging at his shoulders now, her kisses as voracious as his, her desire as out of control. Keira cried out suddenly and her eyes flew wide, locking with his, searing ecstasy breaking over them in tingling waves of fire."

Lover's Moon -- Catherine Linden

Suck Face, Galactus!

"On a little moan of desperation she surrendered herself, denying him nothing, offering him everything in a kiss that blotted out time, space, conscience...
What she couldn't say in words, she said with her lips, her hands. She was starving for him and would gorge herself on his mouth for as long as he allowed this mindless ecstasy to continue."

Second-Best Wife -- Rebecca Winters

Phallic Abuse: The Silent Victims of the Kegal Fad

"She used him as her anchor then, her grip like a vise, a tourniquet, until he lost all feeling in his ill-used shaft."

Undeniable Rogue -- Annette Blair