Uncle Walter's Bad Romance Novel Quotes

A date with Baron Samedi always ended the same way: Sex, Death, or Resurrection. Sometimes all three.

"The sex god pushed his cock so deep into me that I thought it would penetrate all the way to the other side and out of my stomach."

The Magic Cock in Gay Heaven -- Nathan J. Morissey

Sexual Origami: Bend it like Buddha

"Almost folding her completely in on herself, he made love to her as if possessed."

Slow Burn -- E.B. Walters

You found him? I didn't even know he was lost!

"It flowed through him like warm syrup, heating the places that were cold. He'd been in darkness, and now he was bathed in a warm light.
Jesus!"

Dream Strokes -- Desiree Holt

You can’t hide the thunderbolt. When it hits you, everybody can see it. Christ, man, don’t be ashamed of it, some men pray for the thunderbolt.

"Each stroke sent a bolt akin to one of Zeus' thunderbolts through his loins."

A Touch Of Greek -- Tina Folsom (Olympus #1)

When they'd play "Little Pope" he'd pull his foreskin up like a hat.

"Finally a cry broke from her throat as she felt Geoffrey's body spasm in release and his seed flow into her like a benediction."

Fatal Crown -- Ellen Jones

Can you blame her? You know what they say about him: 40 cubits big and he comes with a pair.

"Need spiraled through her, a deep, gut-wrenching need that only Noah could satisfy."

Bridleton -- Becky Barker

She'd gotten drunk off of the blood of Christ, got into bed with the body of Christ, and... Oh my! She certainly didn't get that during Communion!

"The glance they shared was open and naked, and as intimate as his cock inside her.
'God.' Her nails dug deliciously into the muscles of his back. 'You're so hard. And big. Jesus, you're so thick and long.'"

A Dark Kiss of Rapture -- Sylvia Day

P.S. We're totally going to hell, aren't we?

Margaret Thatcher nudus in die frigoris! Margaret Thatcher nudus in die frigoris!

"His cock strained painfully, its tip leaking through his drawers.

Swearing under his breath, he sat up -- slowly this time -- and muttered his Latin drill until his erection had mostly subsided."

Silken Threads -- Patricia Ryan

Ego te absolvo in nomine Patris, et Filiii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen

"Julia would have gasped out loud, but her lips - and her voice - were possessed by Hunter."

Going All In -- Jess Dee

So that's where the Mormon's hid it!

"He thrust his cock into her warm, tight little hole and found heaven."

French Quarter: Hot In the City Book 1 -- Lacey Alexander