Uncle Walter's Bad Romance Novel Quotes

FORE... Hole in one!

"He settled himself at the entrance to her core, eased himself in, then drove himself inside her; one deep, powerful, thrust, one potent male stroke that filled her and claimed her as his."

Sweet Vengeance -- Kat Martin

Only one of you should be wearing a blindfold

"He lurched forward in the dark, flinging her onto the bed, from which she promptly tumbled with a rustling of covers and sheets and landed with a soft yelp and a hard thud on the floor."

The Pursuit of Marriage -- Victoria Alexander

Honest! This has never happened to me before!

"He glanced down at his lax penis.  His mouth gaped in mock surprise"

Lady of Sin -- Madeline Hunter

And you thought "cavernous core" was bad!

"They forged on, laboring on through the damp, slimy recesses of the cave."

Lord of Fire -- Gaelen Foley 

I thought you said you wanted a threesome?!

"'When you take me to bed," she choked out, "it is never just the two of us.  Your father is always there.'"

The Duke and I -- Julia Quinn

Breaking wind never felt so good

"She felt herself open and loosen for him, like a sail unfurling to accept the mighty thrust of wind against it, inside it."

The Pirate Lord -- Sabrina Jeffries

Not quite the pussy you were expecting, was it?

"She crawled on top of him and nuzzled his chest like an inquisitive kitten."

A Scandal in Spring -- Lisa Kleypas

Ever throw a hot dog down a hallway?

"He captured her lips and she poured desire back into him, still wanting, still needing, deep in her throbbing, cavernous core."

A Lady's Secret -- Jo Beverley

Is this "pop" quiz true/false or multiple choice?

"Was it time to open her legs yet?"
Dark Champion -- Jo Beverley 

Set the microwave to defrost for some man-meat

"Why is he in my freezer?"
Sex & the Immortal Bad Boy -- Stephanie Rowe